Tips For Finding a Good Roommate

Most people have a roommate horror story, or two, that they've lived through. Like that one roommate who decided to get art for the apartment, then sent you a $300 Venmo request when you didn't agree to any of it. Or that one who would eat all the food, but never pitched in for groceries. Who you live with is one of the most important aspects to coliving and it only takes one bad roommate to turn an amazing shared home into a living nightmare.

While it may seem impossible to find the perfect roommate, you can do a few simple things to filter out the whackos and be left with great prospects. Here are some steps worth your time if you're on the hunt for a good roommate.

Ask Friends For Recommendations

If you haven't heard already, living with a friend can be risky. Your friendship can quickly fall apart if you aren't compatible roommates. So while it might not be in your best interest to live with your friends, that doesn't mean you need to jump into living with a complete stranger. What you can do is ask your friends for recommendations.

Someone introduced to you by a friend or family member will be more trustworthy and a lot more likely to fit the profile of your ideal roommate. You may be surprised at how many have "a co-worker looking for a place to live", or "another friend whose lease is ending soon".

Use an Online Roommate Finder

If you aren't having much luck asking around, you can use a roommate finder for some help. These are a lot like dating apps, where you browse potential roommates and pick possible matches that you want to meet for further vetting. As you browse keep your mind open, but your eyes peeled for possible scams. These sites listed below are reliable sources that can get you off on the right foot and one step closer to finding your ideal roommates.

1. Roomster - This roommate finder not only allows you to search for roommates but also find rooms available for rent in any location around the globe. Users are not only encouraged to connect their social media but also to undergo an ID verification. This way users can do their research and feel rest assured that they are who they say they are.

Cost: You can create an account and look at other users profiles for free, but if you want to send messages or view someone's social media you'll have to pay for a subscription: a three-day trial is $5.95, or $14.95 for two weeks, or $29.95 for four weeks.

2. Roommates.com - Searching on this site is easy. You simply note whether you're looking for a room or if you have one available, then search your location. You can browse and message potential roommates, but use your judgment and always meet new people in a safe and public space.

Cost: Account creation and messaging are free to start, but it will cut off your messaging and limit how much of their profile you can see. You can upgrade to a subscription: three-days for $5.99, 30 days for $19.99, and 60 days for $29.99.

3. Roomies.com - This is another site that has a dating app vibe. Users have the option to verify their identity and complete a background check to show their legitimacy. You can also message people without sharing any personal contact information and it's completely free.

Cost: Free.

4. Alcove - Still don't have a roommate? No worries, use Alcove to search for rooms in beautiful houses and apartments. If you see a room that's in the right location for the right price, you simply apply. Then Alcove will have you meet any roommates already living there. After everyone meets if you all agree it's a good fit you can move in! If any of the other roommates leave while you're still renting a room your rent price stays the same (everyone is on a separate lease), and Alcove takes care of filling the extra room. When a new roommate applies for the available room you will get to meet them and decide whether you approve for them to move in with you.

Cost: One-time application fee of $50 dollars. This covers the background check and credit check that all roommates must undergo.

Ask the Right Questions

Interviews aren't just for jobs. Once you find someone you think you could live with, you'll want to ask them a ton of questions to get a thorough sense of their habits, personality, and social life. You don't want to move in with them and be surprised by their habits or lifestyle. Here are some important questions you may want to ask to help you get to know them and spot any red flags before you sign into a lease with your new roommate.

• How seriously are you taking Covid-19 and social distancing?

• What is your work schedule? 

• Are you a morning person or a night person?

• What is your sleep schedule?

• How often do you have people over?

• What do you like to do on the weekends/days off?

• Do you have a significant other?

• What are your thoughts on overnight guests?

• What are your daily cleaning habits?

• What would you say is the cleanliness level of the place you live in now?

• Have you ever had a roommate you didn’t like? Why?

• Who was the best roommate you ever had? Why?

• Do you smoke?

• Do you have pets?

• Do you like to cook? How many nights a week do you typically cook food at home?

• What are you looking for in a new roommate?

This list isn't exhaustive but is a good start for you to brainstorm what is important to you in a potential roommate. You don’t want to spend the entire meeting asking questions, so pick a few that you think will give you the information you need to decide if you could co-live together.

The most important part is to be honest with yourself. You're allowed to love a potential roommate, but if they have opposite sleeping schedules, or they are not as careful as you with Covid-19, or they simply don’t keep the home as clean as you would want, you should look for another roommate. Answer the questions you ask them so you can have a direct comparison without letting anything cloud your judgment.

Be Upfront About Costs

Being diligent in your initial roommate search can prevent future fights or issues. You'll obviously want to be on the same page about rental costs and how much you can afford, but take into consideration other expenses as well. What are your expectations around splitting bills? Do you plan to split all food costs, or buy your own groceries separately? What about furniture in shared spaces? Will one of you bring more furniture to fill the living room or will you get a couch together and split the cost?

It's important to make these decisions ahead of time to set expectations and build trust. If one of you has a larger budget than the other you can always use Alcove to find a place to live. Each room has its own separate lease with a rate dependent on both the size of the room and whether there's a private or shared bathroom. So you can live together in the same house, but not worry about having to split rent or utilities.

Make Sure Everything is in Writing

Even if your new roommate says they will pay for half the groceries or agree to only socialize with friends at a distance, make sure you actually get it in writing. As annoying as it may seem, you will be worse off if you have problems arise and it's their word against yours.

Once you move in sit down together and create a roommate agreement. Having clear guidelines that you can reference back to will make it much easier for everyone if a conflict were to arise. Stay honest and realistic. By keeping the dialogue open with your roommate you will stay ahead of any problems and both be much happier in your living situation.

Finding a good roommate may take a little more work than you initially thought. By putting in some time and effort into your search, you will save yourself from pain and suffering that may come later. There are plenty of sources at your disposal to find your ideal roommate and while no one person may be the perfect match, don't settle for someone who you know will be reluctant to set some ground rules.